Hey guys!! What I am about to share with you is not easy but for the sake that it may help some of you with you own breakthrough in life and with God, I will open up my heart. Last week I shared about my breakthrough and how I had felt forgiven and free during a worship experience. Today I want to talk to you about one reason why I was not able to get a breakthrough in my relationship with God prior to that experience.
Since we are made in the image of God, in order to worship God wholeheartedly, we must first be able to love and forgive ourselves. I had been carrying shame and guilt for what I had done and I could not forgive myself for a sin that I “had” committed previously but already had been forgiven by the person who I caused pain to.
Something I’m not proud of
I had betrayed a friend by revealing some private issues to our mutual friends. Even though what I shared were facts, I made a mistake by revealing the personal matters about someone who was not in the room. This is gossip and it is a sin. My situation turned into a disaster, as gossip does not lead to anything fruitful.
"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5:23,24
Once I learned that I had been in the wrong, I apologized and had been forgiven. But the guilt was eating away at my soul. The scenario of what had been said played in my mind over a thousand times and I felt so awful. It would have been easier if I had been confronted right away rather than dragging it out and prolonging my anxiety.
I was constantly feeling weak, condemned, guilty and shameful. But God said "NO MORE". God spoke to my heart that day. He reminded me that I had been forgiven and that He knew that I was sorry. God helped me to forgive myself and move on with my life and to finally worship Him in a way that pleased Him.
There is a way out!
Today, I stand strong, free, and forgiven. I can raise my hands to heaven in worship because I KNOW my Savior who had forgiven me of my sins, the one who has taken away my shame and guilt on the cross.
What have you done in the past that you are still holding on to? What area of your life do you need to ask for forgiveness or forgive yourself in? Or maybe you are the one who had been hurt by someone and they might not even be aware of it. I encourage you to get reconciled and become free. The sooner you do that the sooner you will be able to worship God wholeheartedly. The uncomfortable confrontation is so worth the result of redemption and forgiveness. Jesus is standing with His hands opened wide; He forgave us even when He knew that we would sin. How awesome is that? Thank you Jesus!
Un-forgiveness is like an opened infected wound. If left untreated, it could cause serious health risks and even result in death. We cannot worship God if we have these sins hanging over us. So make things right all around.
- Confront those who hurt you and get reconciled
- Ask for forgiveness from others
- Forgive yourself
I truly believe that the reason why I had experienced grace that night at the retreat was because my heart was pure. I had made things right with my friend once I learned that there was a grudge held against me. The only thing holding me from submerging myself into worship was MY OWN guilt and shame. Once I surrendered my life to Christ and invited Him in, I understood and accepted that I had been forgiven by the ultimate God, Jesus Christ. I finally forgave myself.
In Matthew it clearly states that God doesn’t need our worship if we still have conflicts in our relationships no matter who is at fault. The issue needs to be resolved so that people can carry on in worship and to fulfill Gods purpose for humanity.
Next week I will wrap up on worship as well as leave you with key points to help you on your way of true worship and what that may look like in each of our lives. Love you guys. be blessed!!!